The trip home

No pictures from these two days - so we'll have to just go on my own failing memories.

We got an early start on Saturday, loaded the minivan, and checked out by 10:00am. We took 98 west through Pensacola, then across Mobile bay into Alabama (phbbbt!). The drive across the bay was interesting and pleasant. We saw a cruise ship leaving for the Caribbean as we crossed the bridge, and then descended into a tunnel, emerging into the city of Mobile (and unfortunately, no longer on any sort of highway). The city was beautiful (at least, the part we saw of it while trying to find our way back to any major artery). Lots of plantation style homes with Spanish Moss hanging from oak trees, whose branches formed an arched canopy across the street.

The rest of the trip was pretty uneventful. We quickly left Alabama (Yay!) and crossed into Mississippi (Boo! - just kidding [not really]). Mississippi is just as long as Alabama, and not any more engaging. We proceeded northwest to Hattiesburg (which is remarkable only in its complete lack of noteworthy characteristics). We stopped at a Subway/Gas Station for sandwiches and fuel (and it had one of the filthiest restrooms I've ever seen - yuck!), then continued to Jackson to meet up with I-55. We continued north to Horn Lake, a Memphis suburb which is just south of the Tennessee state line.

We spent the night at a Drury Inn, which was big enough for all of us, but not really very upscale. The room smelled like someone had been drying beef jerky when we walked in - a strong hickory smoke odor. It was a "suite" - a main room with bathroom, couch, chair and a TV in a cheap-looking entertainment center, and a separate bedroom with two queen beds and a nightstand. We ducked out quickly after checking in for dinner (I think we found an Applebees or something like that).

We came back to the room (man oh man - what is causing that horrible smoky smell?), and changed into swimming suits for a dip in the pool. The girls swam for a while (Lorie's strategy - wear them out late at night with activity so they will sleep well and be ready to go in the morning). After they closed the pool around 10:00pm, we returned to the room (whoa! Smell that smoke!) and went to bed.

In the morning, I went in search of the coffee maker. I was sure we had one, but I had trouble locating it. Then I found it, on a slide-out shelf in the cheapo entertainment center. That's when I figured out where the smell was coming from. Apparently, some previous occupant or occupants had started the coffee maker and slid the shelf in. With the coffee maker heating water and its burner on in that enclosed space, it generates enough heat to scorch the particle board interior. The result is that sickening smell.

We had a short day of driving, so we checked out at a leisurely pace and visited the hot breakfast in the hotel lobby. It was better than the one we had at the hotel in Nashville. They actually had people bringing hot food out from a kitchen somewhere (as opposed to just providing microwave biscuits). But all-in-all, I was under-impressed by the Drury Inn. I miss my SpringHill Suites.

We loaded up into the Suburban Assault Vehicle and headed north, through Memphis. We saw 15 or 20 minutes of the state of Tennessee before crossing into Arkansas for an hour or so, then entered Missouri through the bootheel.

There were armadillos on the side of the road in Southern Missouri! This shocked me. I've never seen an armadillo in person, and I assumed they all lived in Texas. I certainly had no idea that they inhabited our own state. There were also plenty of cotton farms where fascinating-looking machines were busy bailing white fluff into building-sized cubes. Who knew we grew cotton in Missouri?

We stopped in Sikeston, I'm ashamed to say, to visit Lambert's Restaurant - the home of the "throwed rolls".

I was watching the Food Network just a week or so ago, and they had a show called "Top 10 Places to Pig Out" (or something like that). Lambert's was the #1 Pigout place in the country.

This place is surreal. First of all, we were there around 2:00pm, and it was packed! Bikers were everywhere, along with plenty of families. We waited about 45 minutes to be seated. This is apparently the norm, as they provide plenty of outside seating, and a playground complete with a homemade-looking, wooden choo-choo train for the kids.

The restaurant building is huge with its own giftshop. The inside looks sort of like a immense log cabin, and the classiest decorative feature was the hundreds of old license plates on the walls. We were seated at a long picnic bench style table.

The menu didn't have a lot of low-carb entrees. Chicken fried Pork Chops, Deep Fried Breaded Spare Ribs, Whole fried turkeys stuffed with barbecued sausages and Snickers bars... Well, I exaggerate slightly.

I ordered a barbecued pork steak, and it came with two sides. In addition to that, they provide "pass-arounds": additional side dishes (like fried okra, fried potatoes, blackeyed peas, macaroni and tomatoes, sorghum [whatever the hell that is], etc). You just wait for someone to walk by your table that happens to have a pot in his or her hands, get his/her attention, and they slop more food on your plate.

And they literally do throw hot dinner rolls at you. A guy pushes a cart with a 12-dozen size muffin pan full of yeasty Parker House rolls fresh from the oven. You wave him down, and he pops one out and throws it across the room to you. (You can't have one if he's standing right next to you - you have to wait for him to put some distance between you and him so he has some throwing room.) You have to catch it barehanded, and it is HOT, and moving pretty fast, so it's not as easy as it might sound.

Well, nobody left that place hungry, and we all had to-go boxes filled with leftovers. I think I probably gained 14 pounds just from that one meal.

We hit I-55 North and made it home by 5:00. All three kids had school the next day, so we unloaded as quickly as possible, had leftover Lambert's grub for dinner, and hit the sack early.

Return of the Red

The green/brown algae cloud had returned during the night, and now the entire gulf was murky and nasty looking. The purple flags were back, and we decided it was a good day to visit the bayside pool complex instead of the beach. The girlies and I spent a couple of hours floating on the lazy river, and the lack of crowds (even with a beach that was, for all intents and purposes closed) made the experience much more pleasant. Mom spent her time relaxing on the lounge chair, reading and drinking in the Florida sun.

There was one kid who gathered at least six innertubes and stacked them over his body, traversing the lazy river in an unstable and threatening tower of yellow donuts. Somehow he managed to see where he was going, keep the stack from collapsing, and even hold conversations with other tubers. I would love to report that this child was endearing and cute, but in truth, he was just annoying. It seemed like he was hovering right behind me for the longest time, casting a six foot shadow over me. I just wanted to relax and he wouldn't go away.

We stayed at the pool until nearly 2:00pm, when finally hunger got the best of us and we gathered our belongings and trekked across the bridge to the gulfside complex for lunch.

We relaxed at the condo for a while, and then Mom, Jules and I decided to take a long walk on the beach. We left the two older girls in the condo to enjoy some garbage on the Disney Channel.

The Red Tide had done great damage to the native residents of the gulf, and dead fish littered the beach everywhere. Julianna was particularly disturbed by the number of fish that had succumbed and washed up on the beach. We had to watch our step as we walked the mile or so down to the Okaloosa Pier. More than once, a member of our party shrieked as she discovered an unpleasant, squishy surprise underfoot. The fish had attracted a large number of birds to the beach, and their footprints were everywhere, leaving intricate patterns of modern art in the sand.

The water really looked icky, but at least none of us were experiencing the respiratory symptoms that some folks suffer. After we reached the pier, Julianna complained that her "dogs were barking", so we turned to go back home. As we came near the boardwalk, we noticed some ribbons and chairs being set up on the beach. We found this very curious.

Up on the boardwalk, we ran into a charming, older gentleman who turned out to be originally from Cuba. He had been an official of some sort in the government before Castro took power - a policeman, or a military officer of some sort. He left the country after the revolution, and following a stint in prison as a Batista sympathizer. Somehow, just before his scheduled execution(!), he was released and came to Florida. Lorie and I were stunned by his story, to think that this man narrowly escaped a death sentence. He seemed to have made the best of things, living permanently in his retirement in a gulf-view condo at Destin West, but he seemed sad to be unable to ever revisit his family and native land. He spoke fondly of Cuba and described it as a beautiful place that, but for the U.S. embargo, would be far superior to other Caribbean islands as a vacation destination.

We returned to the condo, and spent the afternoon relaxing on the lanai. As we watched, a wedding party arrived in the area next to the boardwalk, where we saw the ribbons and chairs set up. We watched the ceremony, and even applauded at its conclusion. We were sort of sad that the couple had planned this romantic moment on the beach and it was sullied by mucky water and fishkill.

This was our last night in Fort Walton, and since we were out of Publix groceries, and to celebrate the girls' fabulous grades (which had arrived via email while we were in Florida), we decided to take them to Old Bay Steamers for crab legs. Parking was tight at the restaurant - we had to park around back by some Mexican joint. I was worried that we would have a long wait for a table, and when we walked in and saw the number of people in the place, I was even more worried. But they immediately escorted us upstairs and seated us at a nice, big, circular booth.

We started with a smoked tuna dip appetizer, which was downright yummy. Mom and I both had a salad, which was good, then shared a shrimp and crab leg platter for two. This amounted to a large drink tray filled with whole, boiled shrimp (complete with heads and legs still attached), crab legs, new potatoes, and corn on the cob. This platter would easily feed three. In fact, it came with three little potatoes, three small (soggy) ears of corn, and three sets of crackers. The seafood was great, but the side dishes were meh, at best. The two older girls shared an adult single platter (a smaller version of what Mom and I had), which they loved. They were not put off in the least by the shrimp heads. Their Mom, on the other hand, is somewhat squeamish about shrimp to begin with, and was having a bit of trouble coping. Jules picked a hot dog of the kids menu, and seemed happy with it.

We enjoyed our meals, and we all left with doggie bags. On the way out, at the top of the stairs was a bowl of candies, which looked like green peppermint discs. I grabbed one and noticed it was labeled "Key Lime". Lorie popped one in her mouth, and her eyes lit up. At the bottom of the stairs, in the restaurant lobby, was another bowl. Lorie surreptitiously deposited 10 or 12 in her purse. They were really, really good. Somehow they tasted exactly like key lime pie, complete with crust and whipped cream.

Those few candies actually lasted for a couple of months in the minivan's glove box, with careful rationing. Lorie enjoyed them so much, I tracked down a source for them on the Internet and ordered a two-pound bag for her for Christmas.

After dinner, we went back to the condo and started packing for our trip home.

Liz starts a second decade

After a special Krispy Kreme breakfast treat, and getting out of the condo early this morning, we took the kids to visit Florida's Gulfarium in Fort Walton Beach - just down the road. It was Elizabeth's 10th birthday, and we wanted to do something special.

Honestly, the Gulfarium is exactly the sort of place you would expect from a Florida beach town - sort of hokey, lowish budget, and not all that huge. Lets just say that Seaworld doesn't have to be concerned for the competition.

We watched a sea lion show, a dolphin show, and a combination dolphin/sea lion show. They were all very similar. The kids and their Mom really enjoyed the dolphin show, which featured two female bottlenose dolphins in a tank that was maybe 50 feet across. There was a lady with a broken leg seated in the first row, next to the railing. At one point in the show, someone stumbled over her crutches, which had been lying on the ground in front of her, and they fell into the tank. The trainers stopped the show, and began to suit up to retrieve them. But the dolphins did the work for them. They swam over and nosed one crutch, and then the other, up toward the stage where the trainers were waiting. Just like that, the problem was solved and the show continued.

After the dolphin show, we lingered for a long time, just watching the dolphins play with a soccer ball in the tank. The crew finally asked us to leave, and we descended the stairs that ran along the side of the tank. There was a window in the side of the tank, to which the girls were immediately drawn. The dolphins, swimming in circles, peeked out through the window at the girls with every pass, eliciting squeals of excitement. I think we hung around there for at least 45 minutes after the show had completed.

There were other, less performance-oriented exhibits. We watched the penguins being fed, and also got to see them feed the otters. There was a tank that held several different rays and skates. (I'm always interested in these animals.) One area was roped off as a makeshift sanctuary for sea birds, mostly pelicans, and we happened to be there during feeding time also. The alligator/crocodile area was fairly extensive, and in the process of being expanded.

A tide-pool exhibit at the Gulfarium, under a canvas tent, was being fed somehow with water from the gulf. We walked through the transparent flaps, and had a quick look around. Several people in the tent were coughing and fighting to get out. I personally didn't have a problem (and I do suffer from allergic asthma at times). The girls started complaining about burning throats and started coughing while we were there. We exited quickly. Red Tide strikes again - however, we still didn't know that what we had witnessed was Red Tide. We just thought it was odd and somewhat scary that people were distressed by something in that tent.

On the way out, we spent quite a bit of time in the gift shop. The girls each bought a trinket to remember the morning.

We went back to the condo for a late lunch, and then hit the beach. The water looked fairly clear, and the purple flags were gone, so we figured it was safe for the girls to swim today. And swim they did. They went way out into the gulf, so far in fact, that I was concerned they may have been in the shipping lanes. On the beach, one or two dead fish were present. The folks next to us had buried a couple of casualties in the sand to keep the flies away.



After our beach time, we retired to the lanai to enjoy another stunning sunset (camera-shy Katie hid behind her Florida shirt). I got cleaned up, and went into Destin for Liz's chosen birthday dinner entree: pizza. I visited Ciao Bella Pizza, just across the Destin Pass Bridge and right next to our favorite Destin eatery, McGuires. I ordered a Margherita pizza for Mom and I, and Italian Sausage and black olive for the girls. I sat at the bar while they baked our pies, and sort of enjoyed the people-watching opportunity.

The place was packed, so I knew the food was going to be good. I was seated close to the gelato case, and it took a copious quantity of willpower to avoid a pre-dinner snack. Several kids came up while I was waiting and ordered a dish of gelato. I was dying to sneak a taste - but of course I did not. The group seated at the table behind me, who I believe were from Alabama, found themselves finishing their dinner with extra wine in their carafe. These folks were so friendly, they actually offered me a glass of wine, which I thought was incredibly generous, but I did gratefully decline.

Driving back to the condos with those two pizzas made the short drive nearly interminable. The odor of them was so enticing. Once back at Destin West, we were not disappointed. The pizza was great - and especially so for St. Louisans - it was on a crispy, thin crust with a softer cheese (provel instead of mozzarella?). Highly recommended.

After dinner, we brought out a Publix birthday cake with candles for Liza, and enjoyed another surprisingly well crafted dessert.

Why do they call it 'Red Tide' when it's really Green?

There are two types of people in the world: Sunset people, and sunrise people. I'm a sunset person, as you could probably gather from the photos in my previous post. Lorie, on the other hand, is a sunrise person. She got up early this morning and sat on the lanai, observing the sun's daily debut.

Soon after, we saw the beach setup guy drilling holes in the sand for his beach umbrellas. Later, a tractor arrived and began to groom the sand, removing day old footprints, bottle caps, and sea gull droppings. We watched this procedure with fascination. We dubbed the device the "Sandboni".

("Sandboni" is a registered trademark of DontLikeSpam Enterprises Incorporated, all rights reserved).

The beach was nice in the morning, but around 2:00, what looked like an aquatic, nasty, green cloud started moving from east to west across the bay. It was frightening to see. We were at the condo when we noticed it, and we didn't have any idea what it was. But it was impossible to miss as it moved across the gulf like a fast-moving cold front, consuming the crystal clear water and bringing murky, brown ickiness in its wake. Red Tide.

We later found out that Red Tide is a bloom of a particular strain of algae. It sometimes comes when the weather is warm late in the year. Obviously, from the pictures, it causes the normally clear, emerald waters to turn murky with an ugly brown/green/purple color. What you don't get from these shots is that it also kills the fish, and causes folks on shore to cough and wheeze.

The red flags, which had just been removed the day before, were replaced with purple ones (Marine Pests Present). That meant no more swimming in the ocean - again. The girls were unhappy, to say the least.

I took the Nikon and snapped some shots of the Red Tide for documentation purposes (but these pics of Lorie's are more dramatic). I also took the opportunity to try to capture some of the interesting geometry and color combinations of the Destin West complex. Here are a few of those shots:



We all hopped in the minivan that afternoon and went into Destin Harbor to research dolphin cruises. We watched some of the fishing boats unload their catch. One charter passenger, whose cache of tuna and wahoo was emptied onto the dock, was hollering at the captain because the ship's dog (a terrier mutt of some sort) was busy chewing the tails off of all the freshly caught fish. The captain was nonchalant about the situation, shrugging his shoulders and explaining, "He just likes to eat the tails." What the heck - you're not going to eat the tails right? So let the dog have them.

The Destin Fishing Rodeo was in progress, and we ambled over to AJs to see the festivities. There was much drinking and celebration over the catches of the day.

Later we visited our favorite restaurant for dinner - McGuires. We had a long wait, but the weather was fantastic (ignoring the unseen cloud of goo that lay, festering, in the gulf just blocks away). We hung around outside, and the smell of the smokehouse (where they prepare the smoked prime rib) was maddening! We all ate too much and went home full and woozy.

I've lost the brain cells that stored these memories!

I know the date of this post says 10/9/07, but I'm actually writing it 10 months later. I started blogging this trip reasonably soon after we returned, but then stopped, and didn't pick it back up until my wife and I decided to plan another trip to Florida. I've been using her pictures to refresh my memory.

Well, Lorie took NO pictures on this day. I have a couple of shots, which I will post here, but I try to shoot "artsy" pictures - they aren't entirely helpful for remembering the daily activities of a trip. So, I'll just guess, or make up some stuff. What the hell do you care?

I'm pretty sure we hit the beach in the morning. The red flags were down, so we allowed the girls to swim. They went further and further out into the gulf, making me nervous, but honestly the water was only three or four feet deep even 100 yards out. We had our beach umbrellas from Publix, so we were able to fend off the sun and enjoy our time at the beach. The family next to us had kids with them, and Julianna made friends with them and joined them in their sand-digging activities. I spent a lot of time laying in the sun and working in my NYT Crosswords for the Beach book that Lorie had bought for me.

We probably went up to the condo for lunch.

Later in the afternoon, I went down to the barbecue pits and grilled some Destin Pork Chops. (They didn't have Pork Steaks at the Publix.) There were several other Dads down there, grilling various things - mostly burgers. These Dads were all from Tennessee, as I recall. One came down to the barbecue area with a plate of crab cakes, and he offered one to me, but he didn't look like he had enough to go around so I declined. They looked good, though. We had a nice conversation as I grilled my chops, which had been marinated in a combination of Italian salad dressing and Corona. They turned out pretty good.

We visited the gulfside pool after we finished dinner, and ran into the Tennessee Dads there along with their families. There was an elevator just outside our front door that delivered us to the entrance of this pool. The pool was really big, and featured a hot tub and a small "baby pool". As you can see from this picture (taken from our lanai), the pool was not anywhere NEAR as crowded as the bayside complex had been the prior weekend.

Lorie and I spent the evening on the lanai, enjoying a stunning sunset. The kids probably were inside listening to the iPod that their Pa-pa loaned them, or watching some dreck on Disney Channel (Hanna Montana marathon, perhaps?).

In this day and age, is there any reason I couldn't telecommute from a condo at the beach, writing code on the lanai by candlelight while I enjoy the sunset and the salt air? I can't think of one good reason why I shouldn't.

Switch your condos, do-si-do

I enjoyed an early breakfast on the lanai, where I watched the Destin West maintenance crew go through the process of recovering from the weekend. Chemicals were added to the spas (which gave me an increased sense of security), the lights along the lazy river were reattached, and the beer cans were collected and disposed of. Lorie had negotiated with the front office regarding our condo switch. They allowed us to remain in the bayside unit past check out time, and would call us when our gulfside unit was ready.

The red flags were still flying at the beach, and the gulf was still roiling. I think the girls and their mom visited the pool for a short time that morning. I went into Destin in search of a bargain on a small beach umbrella and chairs. I was also tasked with the acquisition of tequila and other ingredients for Beer Margaritas. (In Florida, distilled liquor is only available at dedicated liquor stores. The grocery stores sell only wine and beer, so I was unable to pick up the fixings for our new traditional Florida vacation beverage while at the Publix yesterday.) I visited the liquor store, the grocery store, the Walmart, and really never found an umbrella deal better than what was available at the FWB Publix. The chairs were all pretty expensive, and I was pretty sure we weren't going to have room in the minivan to take them home with us.

Back at Destin West as check-out time approached, we collected our dirty laundry, packed up what was left of our food, and finished cleaning the condo. We had lunch, and then the call came in from the front desk letting us know that the gulfside condo was ready. I spent the next two hours lugging boxes down to the minivan, which I then drove across the highway, where I then lugged all those boxes back up to our new digs.

The new unit was super nice - bigger, with two bedrooms in addition to the bunk room. The master bedroom was on the ocean side of the condo (unlike the previous one), with a double sliding door opening onto the lanai. The master bathroom was much more luxurious, and the furnishings were certainly more upscale. The best part (besides the view, of course) was that we finally felt comfortable unpacking our boxes.


Finally settled in, we packed the girls in the van and decided to do some Destin sightseeing. Our first stop was the alligator park at Fudpuckers, a local restaurant. In addition to the bar and grill, they house a small alligator museum, and a fairly large lagoon with live specimens. I assume they were live. They did appear to be breathing, and I'm pretty sure one of them moved. Once.

Admission to Gator Beach is free, and patrons are given the opportunity to buy gator food on hookless fishing pools. Several kids were attempting to entice the reptiles with these "goodies", but the gators weren't having any of it. Several casts dropped directly onto gator snouts, but failed to elicit even a flinch of annoyance. These gators were hot, bored, and not in the least bit hungry.

The museum was small, and sort of hokey, but there was a very animated docent who provided interesting commentary about the animals. My knee was starting to throb (I was recovering from surgery the month before), so I sat in the shade and listened to the lecture while my female companions explored the exhibits. On our way out, we contemplated coming back for dinner, but found the menu to be a bit lacking. We visited the gift shop for a while, then headed east on 98.

We took the girls to the Destin Commons outdoor mall. We had been alerted via the pages of TripAdvosor that the mall contained several features that children would enjoy, including a playground for younger kids, and a set of ground-level fountains. Jules was enthralled with the soft climbing features of the playground, and Liz and Kate dodged the fountain blasts for nearly an hour, emerging soaked to the skin. The girls had a change of clothes in the van, so we let them have their fun without restraining them.


After the mall, we wanted to visit Henderson Beach State Park. It was getting sort of late in the afternoon, close to closing time for the park and campground. We didn't feel like we wanted to pay the rather steep, per-vehicle admission to just drive through quickly and leave, so we turned around and returned to the main drag.

We stopped in to a couple of the stores that I had scouted earlier, but neither Lorie nor I felt the need to pay the prices that were being asked for beach chairs. We traveled west on 98, back toward Destin Pass and the Choctahoochiwoochie Bay (or whatever it's called). It was approaching 8:00pm and we were becoming ravenous.

We visited Dewey Destin's seafood restaurant. Just before crossing the bridge back to Fort Walton Beach, we turned toward the bay and found the dirt road which led to a dirt parking lot behind a dilapidated looking shack on the water. If we hadn't received glowing recommendations for this place, we would have certainly turned around and left at this point. The lot was nearly full, indicative of at least some return business. We walked into the shack that serves as the kitchen and fish market. The menu, written on a blackboard inside, was sparse but sufficient. I ordered grilled Yellowtail Tuna with a Teriyaki marinade. Lorie ordered a similar special - grilled teriyaki Mahi Mahi. The girls ordered fish and shrimp baskets (fried fish with fries and fried hush puppies, with a side of coleslaw that went to Mom and Dad). We also had a crab something appetizer for the table, which was good, as I recall. Outside, we had to wait for a table to open up before we were able to sit. The wooden picnic tables are all outside, on the dock which juts into the bay. No candles, no linen tablecloths, and no wine service. Just really good, really fresh, just-off-the-boat seafood. The Yellowtail was awesome, and Lorie's Mahi was even better. The girls seemed to enjoy their meals as well.

We made it back to the condo about 10:30pm, and after enjoying the view from the lanai, we all turned in.

Red Flags at morning, beaches are boring

(First of all, I will apologize for letting nearly a year elapse between our last post and this one. I will have obviously forgotten many of the details, but I'll do my best to relate our experience in FWB. Hopefully the pictures that Lorie and I took will spark my memory).

Elizabeth and I got up early and visited the Publix where we loaded up on groceries for the week. We even stumbled upon fresh sushi being made, so we grabbed a dragon roll for lunch (which was great, by the way). We zipped home and made bagels and oatmeal for the clan.

Then we suited up and crossed the bridge over Route 98 to hit the beach. We didn't receive a complementary beach setup with our condo(s) this year, so we just laid on towels and endured the searing sun.

The red flags were flying (which, in case you aren't a beach goer, means that the sea was too dangerous to swim). The wind was blowing in strong from the gulf, and the surf was vicious. The entire gulf looked as if it had been agitated to boiling, with whitecaps as far as one could see. The waves pounded the shore relentlessly.

But that didn't stop the girls from wanting to go in for a swim, and they looked at their dad as if he were the biggest stick-in-the-mud on record when I told them that they couldn't. The girls sat in the sand near the water line, letting the violent waves crash over their feet. They kept "furtively" scooting further and further into the surf, until we would yell at them to come back to safety.

Elizabeth and I spent a long time making a sand mountain with the kids' beach toys. We probably managed a 4 foot high mound of sugar-white sand.


Katie started collecting shellfish as they were washed up on shore. The waves would wash in, and as they ebbed away, the displaced crustaceans would dig themselves into the protection of the sand, leaving telltale bubbles and craters in the beach. Katie would swoop in and grab the little critters and add them to her newly formed, miniature menagerie. (She later returned them to the sea - subscribing to the "catch and release" philosophy.)

Julianna, for the most part, simply sat in the water and let the waves wash over her. She was starting to take on the appearance of a drowned rodent.


It took every mote of energy in their bodies to keep from frolicking in the surf. At one point, the three girls joined hands (carefully, with Elizabeth's left wrist, which had been fractured playing soccer just a week or so earlier), and jumped in unison over the incoming waves.


Without a beach umbrella, we were beginning to crisp under the sun, so we gathered our gear and headed back across the highway to our condo for a late lunch. We each had a quick shower, and then ate sandwiches and sushi, enjoyed iced tea, and watched the pool area from our lanai.

After a short rest, we put on our "pool suits" and ventured downstairs to the water park. On the bay side of the highway, Destin West has an extensive network of aquatic activities. Two or three pools, two hot tubs, a waterfall, and a lazy river. The hot tubs were all crammed with LSU college kids. It seemed like 30 or 40 were soaking in each whirlpool, most with a canned beverage and a cigarette.

We grabbed innertubes and launched ourselves into the lazy river. The river was also crowded with rowdy students, as well as other families. The river "banks" were lined with discarded cans of Bud Light and Red Bull. At one point, a couple of mischievous kids (guys, of course) stood on the side of the river, near the building that housed the restrooms. As the kids and I drifted by, the two young men splashed copious amounts of water from the river into the louvered window which vented the men's room. From behind this window, a voice with a southern drawl shouted, "Oh, you dirty sons of b****es!". Having been in this room, I knew that he had been standing at the urinal as this attack occurred. I imagined myself covering the eyes and ears of my very proper young ladies as we floated away from the high jinks.

We were sort of confused about the fact that the LSU crew were still hanging around, this late on a Sunday. Then we realized that Monday was Columbus Day, and they all must have the day off. Once again, the east-coast dedication to this holiday (which means almost nothing to us, since my company doesn't recognize it) caught us off guard - just as it did in '05 when we unwisely chose to visit Disney World on Columbus Day, along with every other family within 500 miles.

We stayed at the pool quite late, and as the sun began to set, the students finally started to thin out. Once we had some elbow room, we explored the various other facilities (although I wasn't about to get in either of those hot tubs until they received a good shock of chemicals). We spent some time swimming in the pool with the waterfall, then finally decided to pack it in for dinner.

Back in the condo, we made spaghetti with sazizza, a family favorite, along with salad and garlic bread. A Publix key lime pie provided a welcome, Floridian finish to our meal. The pie was outstanding, which was surprising considering that it came from a grocery store bakery.

Lorie enjoyed the relative quiet of the pool area from the lanai, while painting her and the girls' toenails with the special "beach polish" supplied by Aunt Sarah. Once we managed to get the girls in bed (with Julianna in the living room on the couch), their mother and I retired to our bedroom, which remember, overlooked the parking lot on the Highway 98 side of the building. We were reading for a bit before turning in, when we heard a bit of a row on in the parking lot outside our window. I went out onto the lanai to determine the cause of the ruckus. A presumably inebriated woman was sitting in the passenger seat of one of the parked automobiles, honking the horn and repeatedly SCREAMING someone's name (Dan, as I recall) through the open car window. Dan was doing his best to avoid the entire situation, as near as I could tell, because this went on for at least 20 minutes. Finally some guy came out to the car and began a loud discussion with this woman. It was fairly amusing to observe, although I think I would have preferred the sound of the crashing surf. Anyway, they eventually shut up, went inside, or drove off to a secluded area and beat each other to death - I don't know, but at least the shouting stopped.

The next day was Monday, and we were looking forward to having much more of the condo complex, including the pool area, to ourselves after the hordes of LSU kids checked out and went back to school.

All-day Alabama (phbbbt!)

We woke up reasonably early, and visited the "hot" breakfast at the Fairfield Inn. Unfortunately, the "hot" part consisted of instant oatmeal, make it yourself waffles, or a microwaved Jimmy Dean bacon/egg/cheese biscuit. Actually, the biscuits turned out pretty good, and the kids enjoyed the waffles (although, they ran out of batter while we were there). The cheese danish were decent, too. On the whole, though, it was pretty pale compared to what we got at the SpringHill Suites in '05. In spite of that, we managed to acquire sufficient sustenance, I think.

We hit the road and crossed the remainder of Tennessee reasonably quickly. We took I-65 south into Alabama. While Tennessee has some beautiful landscape, Alabama is a state that is sort of plain and boring and apparently the size of two Texases and a New Hampshire. Fully 80% of the day, if not more, was spent traversing the length of this state. The girls kept asking "What state are we in now?", and I had to tell them "Alabama, still," to which Elizabeth would respond with a disgusted raspberry. We stopped to pee at a Cracker Barrel in Birmingham (safe choices for biology breaks, the CBs), and we stopped for lunch at a Cracker Barrel in Montgomery (safe choices for gravy covered entrees, as well).

We followed the route that was given to us by AAA on the TripTik we requested. We thought this route had been confirmed by a TripAdvisor forum member (Baked-and-blended). It turns out that Baked's route went further south on the interstate, then turned off on US Highway 31. AAA's route took much more of the southward journey along US Highway 331. This was two lanes, curvy, not clearly marked, and not exactly a mecca for roadside services. So the travel of the day was somewhat tedious. At one point, near Opp, Alabama, the road forked and I bore right where I should have borne left. It took us about 30 minutes to realize that the setting sun was on the wrong side of a supposedly southbound vehicle, then to figure out where we went wrong, and make our way back to 331.

We crossed the Florida state line around sundown at the town of Florala, and continued for about 90 minutes more until we reached the Fort Walton area. The moment we crossed into Okaloosa county, it started to rain. We had completed nearly 12 hours of driving, and at this point, the girls had reached the saturation point for being couped up in a smallish vehicle with little to do and/or see, and they started to act up a bit, raising the stress level for the final half hour of the trip. The dark and rain didn't help much, either. We crossed through Eglin Air Force base, then drove through the town of Fort Walton, and finally over the John Brooks bridge (really, John, that's what it's called!) onto Okaloosa Island and the resort area of Fort Walton Beach.

We pulled into the condo complex of Destin West. Making a left across Highway 98 in the dark and the rain was sort of tricky, especially as we weren't sure where exactly we should do it. In fact, we attempted the left one "exit" early, until I realized we were headed toward the locked gate of the marina next door to Destin West. We had to swing back out onto 98 and move down to the next "left turn lane". Once we made it in, I parked outside of the rental office, and Lorie gathered our paperwork and went in to check us in and get our keys. The second that she set foot on the wet tile on the front "porch" of the office (it was still pouring down rain, remember), she slipped in her flip-flops and went down like a sack of rocks. She really hit hard on her knees and elbows. It must have hurt like a sonofagun, because she just laid there for a while, with a scrunched-up look on her face. I thought I was going to have to find the local hospital for a second, but then she gathered herself and her paperwork and went inside to take care of business. Poor Lorie.

Destin West is a complex of several different condo buildings. Some are on the north side of Highway 98, and face the Choctawatchee Bay, while others are on the south side of Highway 98, and face the Gulf of Mexico. One of the longest pedestrian bridges in the country connects the two sides of the complex and allows the residents access to facilities on either side without having to risk their lives crossing the constantly congested highway.

We really wanted to stay on the Gulf side, but the one gulf-view condo we found on VRBO was occupied over the weekend, and wasn't available to us until Monday. But the owner of our target condo also owns a one-bedroom unit on the Bay side, overlooking the pool complex (which features a lazy river and several hot tubs). We were able to stay in the Bay unit for two nights, then move over to the Gulf unit for the rest of the week.

So, we all went up to Sandpiper 601, and checked it out. It was nice - a little small for a family of five, but serviceable for two nights. The bedroom was on the street side of the building, with a lanai overlooking the parking lot. There was a bunk "room" (no door, just bunk beds in a little cubby off the hallway) where two of the girls would sleep, and a kitchen/dining/living room with another lanai that overlooked the pool complex. One of the girls would have to sleep on the couch, but there were no complaints about that.

As I was making several trips up and down in the elevator bringing our luggage up to the room, I noticed several groups of younger men, all wearing Louisiana State University athletic attire. They all seemed to be carrying beverages of some sort.

We got moved in (although we were hesitant to actually unpack, as we would be moving again within 48 hours), relaxed for a bit, then decided to head out for dinner. After some discussion, we finally decided to try the Crab Trap at the Okaloosa Boardwalk complex. The service was sort of slow, and they got the order wrong, and the food was overpriced (but about par for the Destin area), but it tasted pretty good. I ordered a cup of gumbo and a grouper sandwich with cole slaw, Lorie had an amberjack sandwich with fries, the younger girls had "kids meals", and Katie had she-crab soup and crab cakes. Katie LOVES crab, but I really didn't feel like I could afford to let her order a $25 plate of legs. She seemed happy with the crab cakes (although, they had too much in the way of bread crumbs for my taste). The she-crab soup was AWESOME. Lorie's sandwich was better than mine, but I still think they switched them - her fish was white and flaky, and mine was sort of brown and dense and flat. I've never had amberjack before, so I'm not sure what it's supposed to look/taste like, but Lorie's sandwich tasted more like good grouper than the one I got.

A great commotion emanated from the bar. A bachelorette party was in full swing, with much lubrication and high-pitched shouting. On the TV, a football game was in progress, which elicited lower-pitched shouting from the male patrons. I noticed on a trip to the restroom that the game was a college game (which makes sense: it was Saturday night...) and that the teams were Florida and LSU. Ah-ha! That's why all the LSU dudes were roaming around Destin West.

So, it was getting pretty late, and we still needed to lay in supplies for the next day, so we headed back across the bridge to the Publix grocery store in Fort Walton. We got there at 10:01pm, and the store closes at 10:00. So we decided I would come back in the morning for cereal and lunch meat and so forth. We headed back to our condo, empty-handed.

We unwound on the lanai, watching the lazy river and the pool area (which is lighted with colored lights at night). Every once in a while, 100 college students would come out to their respective balconies all at once and shout, presumably in response to events occurring in the football game. Around 11:00, after what I understand was an exciting turn of events, LSU overcame a scoring deficit at the last minute and won the game. All of the college kids came out onto the balconies at this time and started chanting "Ell-Ess-You! Ell-Ess-You!".

I guess they all left to go pub hopping after that, because things quieted down quite a bit after that. We weren't thrilled with the spring break atmosphere, but we figured they would all be packing up the next day (Sunday) since they had to be in class by Monday, so we could easily overlook a little rambunctiousness for one night. The kids finally settled down to bed, and Lorie and I crashed hard after a long, tough day. We were pretty happy with the prospect of not having to drive all day the next day.

Hello Nashville, whatcha knowin'?

We got a late start on our road trip this year. Katie is now in middle school, so she only gets one week off in the fall, unlike the two younger girls, who have three weeks off. So, our original plan was to have Katie pack everything up the night before, load up the van during the day on Friday, then pick her up at school at 3:30 with all of our vacation accoutrement in tow.

For some reason, Lorie decided at the very last minute that she didn't want to do it that way - she wanted Kate to come home first then we would all leave from here. Since the van was already loaded, she decided to take the Camry to pick up Katie. Of course, the two younger sisters decided that they had to go with Mom, so Dad was left home to pace back and forth and to wish that we were already hitting the highway. In fact, Dad and the luggage were the only ones not following his original plan. I still can't figure out how that happened.

So of course, once everyone arrived back home, there was much piddling and last minute loading of loose items, so we got an even later start than was planned. Can you imagine that? Us, getting a late start? Hmmm.

We took I-70 all the way to the river, which worked out fairly well. The express lanes were pointing the wrong way that afternoon (due to construction or something? They had been that way for our trip to the ball park for Kate's band performance a month earlier), so we were able to use those lanes to arrive downtown in record time. We bunched up a bit in the depressed section (when I use that phrase, I always picture Eeyore the donkey, standing on the shoulder, head hanging low, eating thistle and grousing about life), but other than that, traffic was fairly smooth.

We crossed our first state line and settled in for four hours of driving. As we were approaching Mount Vernon, I had to perk up and lay on the brakes. A fire engine crossed the median from the west-bound lanes of I-64, right in front of us, and started heading east. About a mile further, he drove off onto the right shoulder. I couldn't figure out what the heck he was up to, but about that time traffic in both east-bound lanes came to a halt. After about 10 minutes of nobody moving, people started to hop out of their vehicles, walk over to the median and try to see what was going on. Some folks bailed, crossing the median themselves to head back west toward alternative routes. As we sat there, two more emergency vehicles passed us on the shoulder heading east towards the unknown catastrophe. Things were starting to look bleak.

After 30 minutes or so, just about the time that we had started to plot our own escape on the AAA road map, things broke up and we started moving, slowly. We drove for a good mile or two before we saw what had happened. There on the right shoulder was the burnt out shell of a Scion SUV - one of those really ugly, plain boxes of a car. The tires were gone, and it was sitting low on the rims. The paint was all burned away, and the window glass was absent. One fireman was standing in the right lane, directing traffic (He was repeatedly waving his arm from left to right, indicating that we should all continue to drive in the only direction that was possible. Your tax dollars at work.) Two others were spraying the smoking wreckage with water. There was an ambulance at the scene, but no sign of any of the vehicle's occupants, or any indication of what might have caused the conflagration. It looked as if the driver had simply pulled over to the shoulder, and in conference with his passengers had decided to simultaneously and spontaneously combust in order to avoid enduring one more moment of association with such an unattractive vehicle.

This all took about an hour off of our time (but we were grateful to have a non-flaming, operational vehicle within which to travel). We drove through a McDonald's in Paducah, Kentucky for dinner in order to avoid stopping. We drove into Tennessee (which is still very pretty), through Nashville, and finally found the Fairfield Inn in Murfreesboro around 10:30. It was fairly nice, similar to the Springhill Suites room. Katie fell asleep immediately (she gets an early start, having to be at school by 8:00am). The other two kids and their mom wound down with some books, and we were all asleep by midnight, anticipating an early start in the morning and an early arrival in Florida the next day. (Hey, we can dream, can't we?)